Practice Random Acts of Kindness

Last fall, Chuck Wall, a Bakersfield College professor assigned his students to commit one random act of senseless kindness. He was listening to a radio report of yet another act of senseless violence and decided to change the wording a little. This assignment was taken seriously and has turned into a movement, applicable to all of our institutions. These are an effective add-on to formal "cultural improvement" efforts and here are some examples - feel free to add some and do them!

Neighborhoods: Neighborhood meetings, free little libraries, and art projects, helping an ill neighbor with yard maintenance
Government: Community policing, addressing homelessness, human rights, access to libraries, and community gardens. 
Schools: Offer opportunities to students, teachers and families to perform acts of kindness to fellow students, teachers, and family.
Workplace: Buy coffee for someone at work, treat a colleague to lunch, use humor with a colleague who’s having a rough morning, make a promise not to speak negatively about a colleague. Resist the urge to gossip, write a thank-you note to a coworker, let selected colleagues know how much you appreciate them, clean up a common area at your workplace, re-engage with a coworker, get to know someone at work you have not talked to in a while, introduce yourself to a new person at your organization, eat lunch with someone new and take this opportunity to learn about what they are like outside of the workplace.

Here are the benefits if we do one act of kindness every day:

  • Building community among colleagues

  • Helping colleagues work together

  • Eliminating negativity in the workplace

  • Improving attitudes and overall communication

  • Improving morale

  • Assisting associates in taking pride in their work

  • Encouraging other positive habits

  • Improving the quality and output of work

The Five Behaviors™: Personal Development Profile is here!

The newest addition to our Five Behaviors brand is here! Created to harness the power of The Five Behaviors across the entire organization, The Five Behaviors™: Personal Development teaches individuals to become better teammates using Patrick Lencioni’s model to completely redefine collaboration.
 
Get ready to grow your business with this revolutionary solution from The Five Behaviors. Personal Development equips your clients with the skills they need to thrive, despite the disruptive, agile demands on today’s workforce.
 
Same Model, New Look, Fresh Approach
Designed for the individual learner, participants do not need to be part of the same team. Rather, they can implement the Five Behaviors from one team to the next, enabling a culture of teamwork. Learners at all levels of an organization will benefit from this program, to adopt its powerful principles, shape behaviors, and create a common language to rewrite what it means to work together.

Click “Products” on this site, then “Team Development” at the left to learn more and purchase yours.

Why the Pre-Hire Process is Really About Planning

Think about the last time you ventured out to find a new job. Did you come across postings that seemed as though they were written a decade ago?

You know what we’re talking about, right? It’s not that the job descriptions are entirely out of date, though sometimes they are. It’s more that what was once an emerging skillset is now an accepted norm in the workplace. Yes, we do know how to use the Internet! Does that mean we get the job?!

Perhaps the company that posted the job descriptions from 10 years ago hasn’t given much recent thought into what they are now and who they want in the new role. And they really haven’t considered how the needs of the position have changed with time. For a prospective candidate, that would be a turn off. And if you’re the one doing the hiring it might just limit your pool of candidates.

To find the right person, you need to know what you’re looking for. To understand what you’re looking for, you need to know what the company needs, and have clear alignment on the core characteristics most important for someone to be successful in the role.

Put more simply, employers need a pre-hire plan. Robert Half, the founder of the first and largest accounting and finance staffing firm, once said, “The time spent on hiring is time well spent.” And that time starts well before the candidate comes in to interview.

Studies show that the lack of organizational alignment on expectations for success in a given job is just one reason that one-third of new hires quit their job after about six months. The exact same ratio of employees knew after the first week if they would stay at their new company for the long-term. These employees could see quickly that they weren’t the right fit. Why couldn’t the employer avoid that before they made the hire?

Think about how different your job is now compared to the one you did a few years ago. Even if it’s the same title, you’re probably learned or applied new skills. Even more, you’ve changed in how you learned to adjust to the changes.

Now think about the traits and behaviors in yourself that enabled you to make the changes, to get along with that new manager (accommodation!), to engage with your team (sociability!). Perhaps in some situations your innate behaviors needed to shift. And you handled it well.

Did your company use science and data to predict these innate traits and behaviors before they hired you? Or, did they use gut instinct and got lucky? Without the right tools making objective hiring and selection decisions can be risky, and expensive.

Mmanti Umoh, a renowned leadership and management consultant, said the optimal talent selection process comes down to planning and having stakeholder alignment early in the process.

By planning ahead with pre-employment due diligence, you can: 

  • Reduce hiring mistakes

  • Accelerate the hiring process

  • Improve hiring precision

  • Minimize the costs of a bad hire

  • Save costs on recruiting

At PXT Select, we help hiring managers and recruiters align on the expectations of job requirements, by finding out what the behavioral and cognitive traits, and interests, are needed for someone to succeed in that role and at that organization. With this, they can develop a job description that clearly states what they are looking for from a prospective hire.

Candidate data sets from the assessment are compared against a Performance Model of the preferred traits for a given job. If the model suggests that an individual whose results fall in the higher range of the scale for a given trait tend to be most successful in the position, then organizations want to hire the people with those similar traits who fall on the higher end.

If the Performance Model calls for scores on the lower end of the scale for a given trait, a lower result is what an organization wants to see. No matter where the range falls, the more similar the candidate is to the performance model, the better the chance they will be successful on that role. PXT Select allows you to create custom models, replicate top performers, or use a performance model library so you can tailor your model to your needs at the time.

Whether you’re hiring from the outside, or selecting existing employees for new roles, a performance model helps you identify top candidates. When used with the rest of the PXT Select suite of reports, performance models can be used to help organizations build career paths for their employees, think about succession planning and build bench strength in their organization.

“Give me six hours to chop down a tree,” Abraham Lincoln opined on the concept of planning and preparation. “And I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.”

How prepared is your organization? Do you have a plan in place? Is it adaptable? If you don’t know, maybe it’s time to invest in finding out. Start planning now.

Call me at 704.372.9842 or email kag@mindspring.com.
 


Bridging Generational Differences in the Workplace

Did you know that for the first time ever, we have five generations in the workplace? Five! In a time where diversity and inclusion are (thankfully!) a top priority for organizations, generational diversity can be easy to overlook. Yet, each generation brings diverse backgrounds, perspectives, and behavioral norms to work that, when effectively connected, can improve organizational culture and performance.
 
The notion of so many generations now working together hadn’t really occurred to us until we watched Chip Conley’s TED Talk, “What baby boomers can learn from millennials at work – and vice versa”. Conley, Airbnb exec—and, coincidentally, Wiley-published author—found himself as the company elder when he brought his hospitality industry expertise to the (at the time) up-and-coming tech startup.
 
“The more I've seen and learned about our respective generations, the more I realize that we often don't trust each other enough to actually share our respective wisdom,” Conley explains. “I believe, looking at the modern workplace, that the trade agreement of our time is opening up these intergenerational pipelines of wisdom so that we can all learn from each other.”
 
We’ve talked before about how Everything DiSC® can help bridge the gap between different working styles…but can DiSC help us connect people across the five generations in today’s modern workplace? We believe it can!
 
People often ask us:

  1. Do people’s DiSC styles change as they get older?

  2. Are there differences among generations on DiSC style?

The short answer is differences in DiSC style based on generations is very, very slight. In statistical terms, age accounts for less than 1% of variance in DiSC styles. This means if you look at all the differences we see across DiSC styles, less than 1% of those differences are related to age. 
 
In other words, DiSC transcends differences in age and serves as a roadmap to connect people across generations. Through this roadmap, organizations can foster work environments that enable all five generations to teach and learn from each other. 
 
Take, for example, a team of two Millennials, a Gen-Xer and a Baby Boomer. They may feel quite different from each other and struggle to connect, blaming this struggle on differences in age and experience. In learning their DiSC styles, they start to see each other from a new perspective. Instead of two Millennials, a Gen-Xer and a Baby Boomer, they might discover they are an S-style, a CD-style, and two D-styles!  Because DiSC delivers actionable ways to connect across workstyles, this team can experiment with new, more effective, ways to work together.
 
Conley states, “I don't care if you're in the B-to-B world, the B-to-C world, the C-to-C world or the A-to-Z world, business is fundamentally H-to-H: human to human.” We couldn’t agree more. Implementing Everything DiSC in an organization connects people on a human level. It helps people understand more about themselves, of course. But maybe more importantly, it also helps people understand others and how they can appreciate their similarities and value their differences.
 
We, like you, believe in the power of connecting diversity in the workplace and generational diversity is no exception. We’ll close with another quote from Conley:
 
“We have five generations in the workplace today, and we can operate like separate isolationist countries, or we can actually start to find a way to bridge these generational borders. And it's time for us to actually look at how to change up the physics of wisdom so it actually flows in both directions, from old to young and from young to old.”
 
To learn more about how Everything DiSC can engage every individual in building more effective relationships at work, call me at 704.372.9842 or email me at kag@mindspring.com
 

The PXT Select Leadership Report

PXT Select is a Wiley product that generates 13 reports with just one assessment. These reports can be used over the life of an associate from selection to onboarding to coaching and development to career planning. 

The newest report is now available after having successfully finished extensive beta testing. 

How you can use this

Selection: This report provides one candidate's results presented in graph form and linked to narrative about their possible approach to six leadership skills commonly required of organizational leaders. The report includes the candidate's potential leadership strengths and challenge, as well as customized questions that can be used to interview the candidate or analyze their leadership potential. 

Coaching and Development: This report is designed to shed light on an associates's leadership potential and provide insight into how they might confront the complexities of a leadership role. It helps hiring managers understand how a candidate leads by providing insight into how an individual's cognitive and behavioral traits and interests can affect their potential as a leader. 

Try one yourself!

You can take the assessment to see what results it tells you so you can verify the quality for yourself. Call me (704.372.9842), email me (kag@mindspring.com) or order online at www.karengeiger.com today to place your order!

Do you want on-site DiSC Certification at your workplace?

I am now licensed to certify your teammates at your workplace, so if you have a new team member I can come to you. The price is the same as if you went to Minneapolis or if you chose online. 

There will be online pre-work (3-4 hours), then I will conduct a 2-day certification workshop, then after some post-session review (90 minutes) online, participants will take a certification exam and receive their certificate after passing at 80%. 

As always, call or email me with questions or to set up a session. 
 

How to listen to the news now

Practice responding to the news using the lesson of this story

Once upon the time there was an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically.

“Maybe,” the farmer replied.

The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed.

“Maybe,” replied the old man.

The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune.

“Maybe,” answered the farmer.

The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out.

“Maybe,” said the farmer.


The lesson: The farmer is practicing non-judgment. He understands the true nature of life, that you can't judge any event as an "end" in a way. Our life doesn't play out like a work of fiction. There aren't definite breaks that separate one moment versus another, and there isn't a perfectly formulated end which everything builds to.

There's always tomorrow. And whether the day was good or bad, there are a million effects which can arise from one event. Good and bad are interconnected. They are, in fact, two sides of the same coin. If things seem perfect, they aren't. If it seems like it's Armageddon in your corner of the world, it's not. Things can change in an instant, at all times. And they will at some point or another.



A Route to Peace of Mind

Once Buddha was travelling with a few of his followers. While they were passing a lake, Buddha told one of his disciples, "I am thirsty. Do get me some water from the lake."

The disciple walked up to the lake. At that moment, a bullock cart started crossing through the lake. As a result, the water became very muddy and turbid. The disciple thought, "How can I give this muddy water to Buddha to drink?"

So he came back and told Buddha, "The water in there is very muddy. I don't think it is fit to drink."

After about half an hour, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back to the lake.

The disciple went back, and found that the water was still muddy. He returned and informed Buddha about the same.

After sometime, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back.

This time, the disciple found the mud had settled down, and the water was clean and clear. So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to Buddha.

Buddha looked at the water, and then he looked up at the disciple and said," See what you did to make the water clean. You let it be, and the mud settled down on its own -- and you have clear water.

Your mind is like that too! When it is disturbed, just let it be.

Give it a little time. It will settle down on its own. You don't have to put in any effort to calm it down. It will happen. It is effortless.

Read this if you consider yourself a White person

Janeen Bryant just wrote an Op-Ed in the Charlotte Observer called "The Real Nemesis to Progress on Race: Fragile Whites". Cut and paste this link so you can read it: https://www.charlotteobserver.com/opinion/article216875135.html

If you're a white person who wants to overcome racism, consider doing this for starters: 

Notice what happens around you that seems to be affected by race, like White couples locking their car doors in the presence of youths of color, noticing how a policeman treats you when you are pulled over, or how we name the race of people of color when we talk about them. Discuss this with your partner, coworkers, or book club, using these questions:
1. What explanations do you have for these incidents?
2. In what ways may they be signs of racial fears, apprehensions, and stereotypes?
3. Have your ever experienced similar reactions in other race-related situations? If so think about them carefully and if possible discuss them with others. What do they mean to you?

And, if you are a White woman who wants to do some deeper exploration of what Whiteness means to you, join our inaugural group of women in Charlotte who will meet once a month for 2 hours beginning in a few weeks to do this work. To learn more, go to www.karengeiger.com, click on "Products" at the top, then click "race awareness" on the left.

We don't have to be fragile when race comes up!

Make the most of challenging situations

August 6, 2018

In many aspects of our lives, we will face differing opinions, approaches and points of view and we can determine whether this conflict is productive or not. 

We offer a 22-page profile (and facilitation kit) that provides you and your colleagues with personalized, effective strategies to overcome these inevitable challenges and helps you:

  • appreciate how your style of handling conflict affects your peers

  • learn to "catch" yourself when going down a destructive conflict path
  • discover how to reframe a conflict situation and choose more productive behaviors
  • build a common language in your organization or work group around appropriate conflict behavior. 

The profiles are $89 each (with quantity discounts) and the Facilitation Kit is $1230, for a half-day scripted workshop with all slides and handouts. On this site, click on "Products" at the top, then "Conflict Workshops" on the left. You can get more information or purchase right there. 

Imagine a Third Wave Women's Movement

Chip Smith, in The Cost of Privilege, describes a current trend to refigure and enhance U.S. women's advocacy efforts to make them more diverse and inclusive. He points out the work White women must do:

  • Be proactive in developing personal relationships with People of Color as one way to establish a personal connection to oppression.
  • Examine our lives to get deeper insights into how race privilege affects our thinking and actions.
  • Don't just dismiss our family members or White folks as being "racists" or "backward", but understand how they arrived at their understanding of the world. 
  • Move beyond a White identity and know that it is a long-term process. 

This is exactly what we'll be doing in the Reframing My White Identity series beginning in September. We have a great group forming, and please register by the end of July so that I can order materials for you. You can register or ask questions either via email (kag@mindspring.com) or on this website - Click  on Products, then Race Awareness and pay by credit card. 

How can we contribute to the success of modern democracy?

Timothy Snyder, in his small but powerful book On Tyranny (2017), points out that history can familiarize and it can warn. In our past, both fascism and communism were responses to globalization - to the real and perceived inequalities it created, and the apparent helplessness of the democracies in addressing them. He offers twenty lessons from the twentieth century that are relevant today and here are just a few:

  1. Take responsibility for the face of the world. The symbols of today enable the reality of tomorrow. Notice the swastikas and other signs of hate. Do not look away, and do not get used to them. Remove them yourself and set an example for others to do so. 
  2. Stand out. Someone has to. It is easy to follow along. It can feel strange to do or say something different. But without that unease, there is no freedom. Remember Rosa Parks. The moment you set an example, the spell of the status quo is broken, and others will follow. 
  3. Be kind to our language. Avoid pronouncing the phrases everyone else does. Think up your own way of speaking, even if only to convey the thing you think everyone is saying. Make an effort to separate yourself from the internet. Read books. 
  4. Believe in truth. To abandon facts is to abandon freedom. If nothing is true, then no one can criticize power, because there is no basis upon which to do so. If nothing is true, then all is spectacle. THe biggest wallet pays for the most blinding lights. 
  5. Investigate. Figure things out for yourself. Spend more time with long articles. Subsidize investigative journalism by subscribing to print media. Realize that some of what is on the internet is there to harm you. Learn about sites that investigate propaganda campaigns (some of which come from abroad). Take responsiblty for what you communicate iwth others. 

Develop Yourself on the Job!

Job assignments play a central role in the development of successful leaders. Cynthia McCauley in Developmental Assignments (2006), offers 10 characteristics of assignments that cause learning:

  • Unfamiliar responsibilities
  • Starting something new or making strategic changes
  • Fixing problems created by someone else
  • Dealing with employees who lack experience, are incompetent or are resistant to change
  • High stakes (tight deadlines, pressure from above, high visibility, responsibility for critical decisions)
  • Managing work that is broad in scope or large in size
  • Managing the interface with important groups outside the organization
  • Influence without authority
  • Working across cultures
  • Being responsible for the work of people of both genders and different racial and ethnic backgrounds.

Engage Productively when there are Differences of Opinion

Would a tool that helps you diagnose your approach to conflict be helpful?

The new Everything DiSC Productive Conflict profile can help you or others you work with either at work or in the community by telling you this:

  • What you do when there are differences of opinion
  • What's important to you in a conflict
  • What drains your energy in a conflict
  • Productive and destructive tendencies you have
  • How you can have productive conflict with other DiSC styles

Try it now! It's only $89 if you purchase it on our www.karengeiger.com site with a credit card and you can take it as well as see your results the same day. Just go to our site, click on Products at the top, then Everything DiSC profiles you can purchase it there. 

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Choose the Everything DiSC solution that's right for you!

Benefits
Everything DiSC® solutions provide rich, versatile learning programs that offer personal insight for learners at every level of an organization, using a consistent language of DiSC®. Using a research-validated learning model, each solution provides in-depth information including tips, strategies, and action plans to help learners become more effective in the workplace. All  Everything DiSC solutions include unlimited access to complimentary follow-up reports and MyEverythingDiSC®, the interactive learning portal exclusive to Everything DiSC.


The Solutions
Everything DiSC Productive Conflict. Designed to help learners curb destructive behaviors so
that conflict can become more productive, ultimately improving workplace results and relationships.


Everything DiSC Work of Leaders®. The Work of Leaders made simple: Vision, Alignment,
and Execution. Based on best practices, Work of Leaders connects to real-world demands, generating powerful conversations that provide a clear path for action.


Everything DiSC 363® for Leaders. Combines the best of 360s with the simplicity and power
of DiSC, plus three personalized strategies for improving leadership effectiveness. For anyone who wants to use 360° feedback as part of their leadership development, whether an emerging leader or an experienced executive.


Everything DiSC Workplace®. Can be used with everyone in an organization, regardless of title or role, to build more effective relationships, and improve the quality of the workplace.


Everything DiSC Management. Teaches managers how to bring out the best in each employee. They learn how to read employee styles and adapt their own styles to manage more effectively.


Everything DiSC Sales. Helps salespeople connect better with their customers by understanding their DiSC sales style, understanding their customers’ buying styles, and adapting their sales style to meet their customers’ buying styles.


Everything DiSC® Comparison Report: Can be created for any two participants to illustrate their similarities and differences. Complimentary, unlimited access available with all Everything DiSC Profiles.


Everything DiSC Supplement for Facilitators: Provides more detailed data about an Everything DiSC assessment and helps facilitate a richer discussion about a respondent’s DiSC® style, including unexpected items. Complimentary, unlimited access available with all Everything
DiSC Profiles, excluding Everything DiSC 363® for Leaders.


Everything DiSC Facilitator Report: Provides a composite of your group’s DiSC styles and information on how DiSC styles can impact your organization’s culture. Includes the names and
styles of each participant. Sold separately.


Everything DiSC Group Culture Report: Helps you determine the group’s DiSC culture, explore
its advantages and disadvantages, discuss its effect on group members, and examine its influence on decision-making and risk-taking. Sold separately.


Everything DiSC 363® Coaching Supplement: Additional information for coaches to use when preparing to provide leaders with their Everything DiSC 363 for Leaders feedback. Exclusively for the Everything DiSC 363 for Leaders Profile at no additional charge.


Everything DiSC Customer Interaction Map: Personalized follow-up interaction maps to help
salespeople navigate from their sales styles to their real-life customers’ buying styles.

MyEverythingDiSC®: Learners gain unlimited access to the mobile-friendly, interactive learning portal that provides on-demand insights about DiSC and strategies for applying DiSC to real
work situations. 

Call me today for more information, a demo, or to order!

Living with "progress"

Technology trends are touted now as so significant that they will "transform our world and how we live in it". Bernard Marr offered 9 Technology Mega Trends that will change our world in 2018 (Forbes, 12/4/17), and four of them are listed below along with a way to stay sane with each. 

Trend 1: The increasing datafication of our lives. Marr says "In the average minute, Facebook receives 900,000 logins, more than 450,000 Tweets are posted, and 156 million emails and 15 million texts are sent." This doesn't point out that we are contributing to these numbers, and points to a quasi-addiction to communicating this way. The antidote: monitor our time on screens and have two-way conversations in addition to the one-way communication these vehicles offer.

Trend 2: The incredible rise of artificial intelligence. AI has advanced so quickly over the last couple of years that the more data an AI system has, the quicker it can learn and the more accurate it becomes. This means computers can undertake more and more human tasks (facial recognition software, analyzing social media messages, listening, speak and even gauging our emotions). Our task here is to collectively decide for whom and what should this serve and to monitor unethical use of them. 

Trend 3: The unstoppable freight train that is automation. Marr predicts that humans will no longer be needed to do the jobs that machines can do faster, safer, cheaper and more accurately, and cites an estimate that 47 percent of U.S. jobs are at risk of automation. What this means for us is to stay ahead of this trend by being sure we have the skills to either manage that automation or develop skills for jobs that will not be automated. 

Trend 4: We're interacting with technology in very different ways. Thanks to smart phones and tablets, we can carry out a whole range of tasks on the move simply by touching a screen. Google has confirmed that searches on mobile devices now outstrip desktop searches. And virtual reality and augmented reality are the next wave in interface innovation, transforming how businesses interact with customers. This requires learning, learning, learning so we can add value to those functions. 

Would you benefit from any of these things in your hiring process?

  • getting a clear picture of the candidate's thinking style, behaviors, and interests
  • asking questions that are tailored to the job and the candidate's relative fit with that job
  • once the candidate is hired, identify ways to enhance performance and maximize their contribution to your organization
  • match people with positions where they'll perform well and enjoy what they do
  • reduce unwanted turnover and boost employee engagement

Ask us about PXT SelectTM. It is a unique selection assessment that does all these things. The candidate takes the assessment once, then you get a library of reports you can use throughout their tenure at your organization. 

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Why Women Working across Race Together is a Compelling Necessity

 I have been observing for a long time that our shared gender does not assume we share perspectives or similar life experiences. And I spent time studying this to understand the nuances of how our respective races experience different realities. But now I see this is much less an academic interest and a compelling need for action. The recent analysis of the voting patterns for Roy Moore told me we are not there yet. Our political order is in peril now, and history warns us that the expansion of global trade produces expectations of progress but also the apparent helplessness of democracies to address inequalities and fascism. It is time for us to learn from our experiences, act together, and preserve the ideals of our democratic society.

Here are some ways White women can work to create a unified political force with women of Color. There is more complete coverage in an article I co-wrote with a colleague of Color (Geiger & Jordan, 2014). As a White woman I am imperfectly working on everything written here, and have chosen to only focus on those of us who live in “the bubble of privilege” because I think we have the most work to do. I hope this stimulates cross-race conversations including reactions and challenges for you.

For those with societal privilege:

1.      Make privilege a problem. Our narrative often focuses on the hardships created for the recipients of racism, not on the practices of those with privilege that create those inequalities. We can change this narrative.

2.      Become an ally for social justice. This is a big one: it means seeking critique from others about our unconscious racist behaviors, paying attention to our public interactions with other White people, trying but knowing we can never truly succeed in seeing and hearing other vantage points, respecting and appreciating cultural differences instead of simply erasing or ignoring them, challenging each other assuming that change is possible even when it seems overwhelming, and creating discomfort for other White people.

3.      Redefine what it means to be White. We can redefine our identities in ways that don’t depend on the subordination of people of Color, and explore how race has affected us before engaging in building cross-race relationships.

4.      Use empathy cautiously. White women often want solidarity without realizing they haven’t really listened to how racial power dynamics have affected their partners of Color. Relationships across race by definition include dynamics of power in them and cultural difference is at some level unknowable. Therefore, empathy and this unknowing must be moderated – we can have a common purpose without understanding the complete experience of the other and should resist saying “I understand” when we may not.

5.      Create a “third culture”. We can create a new space between us called a “third culture” Casrnir (1999). This is when we create interactions that benefit all involved (and check to be sure that’s the case), that focus on communications between human beings instead of racial bodies, and that assumes this third culture is continuously evolving vs. achieved quickly. This will be new and unfamiliar but is important work.

6.      Balance our individual, social and organizational identities. There is a tension that emerges in cross-race relationships: our individual need for identification and our need to identify with the group. We can notice our discomfort with being excluded from conversations about the experiences of women of Color and also welcome the expression of difference. This requires time, trust, and faith.

So, creating an alliance of women means that we seek to know, respect and commit to women who are in essential ways different from us, but whose interests are in essential ways the same.  For White women, alliance is a process of sharing power and resources with others in society in order to create structures equally responsive to the needs and interests of all people. This process requires giving up our tendency to be politically correct, avoid conflict, and perpetuate dominance. It requires us to experience disequilibrium and expect resistance, demonstrate patience and courage, manage our emotions, negotiate agendas, surface and manage power dynamics and hold the paradox of belonging and uniqueness.

We can do this and it may mean that our society survives as a result.

References

Casrnir, F.L. (1999), Foundations for the study of intercultural communication based on

a third-culture building model, International Journal of Intercultural Relations, Vol. 23

No. 1, pp. 91-116.

 

Geiger, K. and Jordan, C. (2014). The role of societal privilege in the definitions and practices

of inclusion. Equality, Diversity and Inclusion: An International Journal, Vol. 33, No. 3. pp. 261–274.

How to stay sane in our times

May we live in interesting times!

Given the popularity of social media; we now are confronted with

  • fake news designed to cause divisiveness, 
  • a vehicle to put out our opinions in the absence of a supportive, constructive community dialogue,
  •  increasing feelings of isolation while we are more connected technologically than ever.

Here are 2 things to do and 2 things to avoid to save our mental health and our civil society. 

Here are two things to do:

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1. Realize that our attention is a choice and be conscious about where we focus it.

2. In conversation, be curious about what experiences have led to someone having a different opinion.

Here are two things to avoid:

 

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Here are two things to avoid:
1. Reading headlines and news (real or fake) that we know will agitate us, and instead figure out how to learn the whole story. 
2. Feeding our outrage and helplessness by reading things that are incomplete and/or designed to outrage us.